Category: Silly

A mug of tea is all I ask,

To soften the day’s weary task.

As rain taps the pane,

In soft, steady strain,

I sit in the warmth of my flask.

I’ve failed at putting on the sheet,

It’s a monster I just can’t defeat.

The corners conspire,

To creep ever higher,

And wrap up around my feet!

I’m waiting at the door for post,

(Perhaps more eager than most)

But the postman walked by,

And I let out a sigh —

Never expect a postcard from Ghost.

My wife she likes to crochet,

Her hook is busy all night and all day-

With yarn in a heap

Whilst I try to sleep,

And blankets keep growing each day!

There was a young woman called Lucy,

who liked her Apples quite Juicy.

She had a big fright,

as she took a big bite,

As the worm inside said “EXCUSE ME!”

There was a woman called Annaliese,

who had the proclivity to sneeze.

She said ‘its no issue’,

and inhaled a tissue,

and now she breathes with ease.

This is the train manager speaking,

Please alight here for Reading,

I regret to inform you,

That we haven’t a loo,

We apologise; engineers are attending.

I’ve never seen Doctor Who,

Quite frankly I don’t have a clue.

Is it time-travel lore?

Or Daleks at war?

What I do know is the Tardis is blue

My Bonnie lies over the ocean,

My Bonnie lies over the sea,

But don’t be alarmed

She is rather charmed,

She’s sipping mojitos upon deck three.

What is the point of a Toby Jug?

With its grinning face ever so smug,

A tankard of jest,

In porcelain dressed,

The ceramic embodiment of a Mug.