Daily Dose Limerick

Your Daily Dose…

  • Bless you

    There was a woman called Annaliese,

    who had the proclivity to sneeze.

    She said ‘its no issue’,

    and inhaled a tissue,

    and now she breathes with ease.

  • Hold the train

    This is the train manager speaking,

    Please alight here for Reading,

    I regret to inform you,

    That we haven’t a loo,

    We apologise; engineers are attending.

  • Doctor whom

    I’ve never seen Doctor Who,

    Quite frankly I don’t have a clue.

    Is it time-travel lore?

    Or Daleks at war?

    What I do know is the Tardis is blue

  • A Scots song

    My Bonnie lies over the ocean,

    My Bonnie lies over the sea,

    But don’t be alarmed

    She is rather charmed,

    She’s sipping mojitos upon deck three.

  • Toby Jug

    What is the point of a Toby Jug?

    With its grinning face ever so smug,

    A tankard of jest,

    In porcelain dressed,

    The ceramic embodiment of a Mug.

  • Porridge

    ‘Tis true that I cannot make porridge:

    I’ve got a Milk and Oat shortage!

    “With water and hay,

    make some gruel”, say they,

    “Because it has twice as much roughage’

  • Hamlet

    To be or not to be, a question

    To a nobler mind, a suggestion:

    To die, to sleep,

    to dream of sheep:

    This is Hamlet in his depression

  • Llanfairpwllgwyngyll 

    They say in Wales there’s nothing but rain,

    Surely those that stay are insane?

    For sunshine, you’ll be bereft,

    The vowels have even left…

    And only the the consonants remain!

  • Another Lazy Limerick

    A curious thing is the Limerick,

    Its rhythm and rhyme a gimmick,

    This one, I contrive,

    the joke will never arrive

    leaving you worried sick.

  • A Lazy Limerick

    There once was a verse quite specific,

    Compact, and a touch hieroglyphic.

    It rhymed A-A-B,

    Then B-A (Not C)

    The famed poem: A limerick.